Friday, May 6, 2011

On our abundant blessing

It has been on more than one occasion that a friend has said something to this effect, regarding our twin pregnancy: "It's because of your 'yes' to God that He has blessed you abundantly."  They usually say this after I tell them of the parallel between the failed adoption situation and our finding out we're pregnant with twins.  First let me say that, no, I don't think it's a simple coincidence that we were prepared to raise non-biological twins had the mother chosen life and that after her abortion we're now pregnant with twins.  I don't think it's coincidental at all.  I truly believe that one of the children in my womb represents the life of the one that was lost.  If that makes sense.  It's kind of hard to put into words.

But...I also have a hard time accepting that we're somehow being specially blessed because of it.

I guess it's because I don't feel like offering to adopt a child who was likely to be aborted is some sort of heroic gesture.  I don't feel like it's something we should be getting "extra credit" for.  I feel like it's just....obvious.

I was talking about this with my husband the other night.  He said, "Yeah.  If you were given the opportunity to take in a slave who would either remain in a life of abuse and suffering or live with you even though it was a little bit inconvenient, would anyone say no?"  Ummm...exactly.  Why on earth would anyone not volunteer for this?  I guess maybe I've just been in the pro-life movement long enough to know that most pro-lifers are inherently selfless and would do the same.  So no, I don't feel like I should be "blessed abundantly" for our "yes" to God.

I'm not saying I'm not grateful for those kind words.  And I'm certainly not saying I'm not grateful for our blessing of twins!!!  Please, please, please don't interpret it that way!!  I sincerely believe we've been blessed abundantly!!!  I just don't know why.  I get a little uncomfortable with those sort of accolades, as if we somehow did something heroic by offering to adopt that child.  Because we didn't. was just obvious.


  1. I agree with you.
    We have offered to adopt many children in danger of abortion and yet have not been blessed with any pregnancies. I don't think God works that way.
    We are simply called to follow His Will and He will bless us in the way He sees fit, which may not even be in this world. We don't earn blessings, like you said...we don't get "extra credit" for being heroic.
    I am glad you were blessed abundantly. Praise God! It is all from Him!

  2. Excellently said! I totally agree. The danger in seeing these things as "rewards" from God means that the opposite would also ring true - that we are "punished" by our crosses.

    God is the giver of every good gift, and His timing is perfect. So the fact that these twins were given to you at the same time as your heart was open to adoption is all part of His timing.

    Praise God!!!

  3. What a blessing! I hope you have a wonderful, safe pregnancy. I just met up with your blog this morning. My little boy is 4 and we are waiting for a second miracle. Who knows what God's answer will be. But it is nice to hear that others are blessed twice over.

  4. I just think you are great!!
    Glad to hear things are well!

  5. I think you articulated this so well! I "second" Second Chances comment... it's not a "reward/punishment" system based on our behaviors. God does bless us, and yes that can correlate with our openness to Him but I don't think it's as simple as A = B. I think it's wonderful how God orchestrated this timing, though, and twins are truly amazing.

  6. I agree one hundred percent. And I rejoice in the blessings you were given!!!!

  7. Sorry I am so slow to just now be following you! I really resonate with this post. When I first started my blog, I thought my audience would be those tempted to do IVF and unaware of Creighton and Naprotechnology. When I did those things, bam, we got dx, treatment and pregnancies followed shortly. I think there is an arrogance about my initial postings-a "you do this and you get this result" that I am all too aware now is the not the case. So many women doing the right thing are not blessed in that way. It was nothing I did. It kills me to think I may have hurt good people following God's will with those initial words/thoughts. Thank you for posting on this!

  8. No coincidences! Hope you are feeling well. I loved your interview with JoAnna. Every time I went to comment I got distracted by the kids, but I am so thankful for you!

  9. You are so amazing! Still overjoyed for you!!

  10. After my 10 years with IF I finally got pregnant (sucessfully) and it was with twins. First time I had tried Clomid versus getting pregnant without meds. People made me feel like I was some kind of hyperfertile or that somehow having twins would wipe away all my past miscarriages. That somehow two would "make up" for having lost 4.

    We lost Toddler Adorable's twin...and I was immediately back in the stage of total fear and anxiety. Her siblings lost made it miscarriage number 5.

    While twins is surely an unexpected blessing, it also means that one's pregnancy could be much more challenging.

    So instead of saying to you, rejoice and bask in the happiness, I am going to double my prayers for you and pray that you have an enjoyable, healthy pregnancy.

    I am sure you will be taking in many more opinions from others and I pray that you feel whole and peaceful as they may say outlandish things to you.

    Your Cross, I am sure, is still very much with you.

    God bless you dear sister in Christ.

    Prayers of understanding for you.

  11. I loved reading all the comments from the other ladies.

    Second Chances thoughts were so well said.

    Praying for a safe and happy pregnancy for you!!

  12. Yes amen!

    I am keeping you and babies in my prayers!

    What your husband said is true (about taking in someobe destined to live in slavery) and yet...

    As we try to discern whether to adopt a second child from the same orphanage as Henry, we KNOW as an older child he is closer to the institution, yet I do not know if I can handle 2 with special needs at once (in addition to the 6 I already have)...

    One other family is interested in the older child, if a family commits to him I can be at peace. But that would be the "easy" answer and I get the feeling God is not letting me off so easy on this one ;-)